So I’m working on a gifset of the scene where Dean tells Sam about his time in hell.
And I know everyone has all the feels over Jensen’s acting in that scene, and how Dean really breaks down when he’s talking about it. But I’m gif-ing this right? And I’m getting emotional over Sam. Because I never really watched him.
And so like, at first Dean tells him that when Alastair bribed him and offered to stop the torture if Dean started doing the torture himself.
And Sam looks like he’s thinking that he’s proud of his brother. He knew Dean would always be strong and resist. He knew Dean could fight anything. Dean is the strongest person he knows. But wow, that must have been horrible. You can see Sam picturing his brother in hell and wondering how he had the strength to keep going:
But then Dean continues and Sam realises Dean wasn’t done talking and he feels like he knows what’s coming but he doesn’t want to believe it:
You can see the moment when Sam realises with a horrible twist to his stomach, that Dean didn’t resist. Alastair eventually won. Dean wasn’t as strong as Sam hoped he would be after all, and it breaks his heart:
And then Sam realises that Dean is starting to lose his composure, his big brother is breaking down. And even though it’s really subtle you can see the second it hits him that Dean really isn’t okay. Concern is in Sam’s face:
And that realization breaks something in Sam because he hates to see his brother like that. And he feels like breaking down too, but he can’t because Dean needs him to be strong, so he tries to hold it in:
And so he tries to comfort Dean.
“Dean… Dean, look, you held out for 30 years. That’s longer than anyone would have.”
But when Sam hears Dean crying he realises Dean isn’t listening to him. His big brother is sitting there hurting and Sam doesn’t know how to help him and he feels scared and useless and desperately wishes he could just take the pain away. He just doesn’t know how:
And I’m just really sad right now because Sam.